Thursday, October 9, 2008

Life Goes On...

With Hannah, Ryan and Abby's birthdays falling right around Halloween, there are always a plethora of activities scheduled for kids. Since Joey was born, I've always said that I will take care of my own needs regarding my grief during this time until Joey was old enough to really enjoy these activities. When that time comes, my grief becomes secondary and Joey's enjoyment of this "holiday" become my priority.

This year my MOMS Club is going to the local senior citizens center so the kids can "Trick or Treat", sing songs, do crafts, etc. with some of the older seniors who don't have family nearby or many visitors. We do this several times throughout the year, but I've never gone to the Halloween event because it usually falls on Hannah, Ryan or Abby's birth day. This year, it's on Ryan's day.

My neighborhood does a Halloween party complete with games, scarecrow making, pumpkin painting and other fun activities. This year, it falls on October 25th~the day Hannah died. Our local Halloween Parade is also on October 25th.

So many activities. Would Joey miss them if he didnt' go? Probably not because he's only 3 1/2 and he wouldn't know they are happening if I didn't tell him. But I will tell him because at 3 1/2, he will really enjoy them.

Will it be hard for me? I really don't know. It's impossible to know how I'm going to feel. But, we will go because even though Hannah, Ryan and Abby died and I love them and miss them, life goes on. And even though it may be difficult at times, I know that's a good thing.

1 comment:

Lori said...

Since my kids are older I had to start pressing on even the first year after Molly and Joseph died. I think I managed to avoid taking them Trick or Treating (Superdad did that), but I still showed up for school Halloween parties, etc... I remember Little T had an adorable class play that year and it was very bittersweet watching him dressed as a pumpkin thinking of all the class plays Molly and Joseph will never be in.

It can be hard to set aside your own needs for the sake of your children, but usually I find it only ends up being to my benefit. It's such a blessing to be a part of all of these activities, and they are only young once. Like you said, life goes on and ultimately, that is a good thing.

I'll be thinking of you and ALL of your babies in the days ahead.